What Hurts the Most
by tutriceange
Summary: Angel has some unresolved issues from her past that catch up with her. She solves it the only way she knows how...keeping it all a secret. Not great at summaries! Rated T, but it may change. [Complete]
1. Chapter 1

Note: This is just an introduction chapter, setting up for what happens next. I don't want to tell you everything, you'll just have to wait until next chapter! Please post a review if you can. I'd like to see what you think--good, bad, and ugly! Thanks!

Angel Dumott Schunard woke up early one Tuesday morning in May, with the arms of her lover around her, Tom Collins. She smiled and turned her head so she was facing him. Collins, which is what everyone called him since he didn't like his name, was still sleeping, and snoring slightly. She just smiled and gently kissed his cheek. She turned back around as she snuggled closer to him. She glanced up at the clock. It was only 5:18 in the morning. She had woken up extremely early, but she knew she would never be able to fall asleep again.

She sighed and gently got out of bed. She made sure as to not wake Collins as she walked out of their room. She went and sat down on their couch, picking up a book she had been trying to read. This book wasn't all that interesting. Maureen had leant it to her, some book about a famous performer. Angel hadn't been paying attention, as of the fact that Collins had just come out of the bathroom after a shower and only had a towel around his waist. She smiled just at the memory of that day.

She sat there and read until she couldn't read that book anymore. She set it back down and glanced at the clock. It was now 5:57. She got up and started walking to the kitchen, planning on making breakfast for her and Collins. But she decided that it was too early to making breakfast, so she went to take a shower.

She quickly took her shower and cleaned up the bathroom. She grabbed her pink and fuzzy robe off the door and wrapped it around herself. She quietly walked out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. She went through her drawer silently as she picked out the outfit she was planning on wearing that day. She quietly walked out of the bedroom again.

She made her way back into the bathroom. She began getting dressed in her outfit. When she was done, she glanced at herself in the mirror. The outfit looked good, at least she thought so. She reached into the cabinet and grabbed her make-up bag. She started to apply the make-up. She smiled when she finished and reached for the last and final piece of her outfit. Her favorite black bob wig. She gently placed it on her head, smiled as she gave herself one final glance over, then walked into the kitchen.

She decided on making eggs. They were quick and easy. She got out her frying pan, eggs, and all the other utensils. She began cooking. She was humming to herself a tune she'd never heard of, but liked.

She was smiling and humming as she cooked; when she felt two strong arms come around her from behind.

"Hey baby, I was wondering where you were," the deep caring voice said.

She smiled and turned around in his arms. "Hey Collins sweetie!" She told him before kissing him gently on the lips. "You sleep okay?" She asked him, as she turned her attention to the eggs again.

He nodded and smiled. "I always sleep okay when you're next to me," he told her. He bent down and kissed her cheek sweetly.

She smiled as she set the eggs on plates for them. She brought them to the counted and handed one to Collins.

He smiled at her and took the plate. "Thanks baby. It looks delicious."

She smiled, taking a bite of her eggs. "What are you doing today honey?" She asked him.

He rolled his eyes and smiled. "Oh…you know! Going to work, dealing with all those kids who only got into NYU is because their daddy's powerful." He told her, laughing at their little inside joke about his job. "What about you?"

She smiled and kissed his cheek. "I'm just going to go shopping with Mimi, probably anyways. That girl can never make up her mind." She told him laughing. "But I'll be back by the time you get home."

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Angel was out walking, Mimi had not called and Angel didn't feel like sitting home anymore. She just started walking to wherever her feet took her.

She was singing to herself again, dancing along the street-a little bit anyways. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw him.

She shook her head and gasped. _No…it can't be…can it? What would he be doing in New York anyway? _

The last time she'd seen him was…two years ago. She kept her eyes trained on the man. She can't believe how much that man still scared her, after two years. She just stared at him, hoping on everything she could that it was not him.

He turned and noticed her. He smiled that evil smile and began walking towards her.

_ Shit! This is not going to be good._

Post: Next chapter, Angel meets up with someone from her past. Meeting with this person sends Angel into a breakdown, mentally and emotionally, so she looks for something to help her calm down...


	2. Chapter 2

Note: This chapter is mostly a flashback. It deals with the man that Angel sees. I didn't want to go into too much detail, so I hope this makes sense! Please review!

Angel glanced around, looking for a way out. There was an alley. Perfect. That's all she needs, to be alone, in a darkened alley, with her ex.

_Move! Run! Do something, don't just stand here!_ She silently screamed to herself.

This was no use. Her legs were not moving, no matter how much she tried. He began walking towards her, wearing that smile that chilled her to the bones. It looked…evil. She shuddered at the memories that filled her head.

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Angel was at home one afternoon when she heard a door slam. She cringed, knowing what was going to happen. He had come home in one of his "moods." His footsteps were coming closer. She took a deep breath, preparing for the worst.

"Hi Jason. How was your day?" This was asked everyday, followed by the same treatment.

He stopped walking. "How the hell do you think my day was?" He said curtly, not hiding the disgust and anger on his face towards her. He stared at her, the fierce anger burning in his green eyes.

She shook her head and whispered, "I..I was just trying--" She had been cut off by a slap across the face. Her hand went to the side her face immediately.

_Don't look up. Don't look at him, you'll only make it worse. Just be quiet, but not too quiet. Act like it hurt, but not too painful. Just let him do what he wants…it'll be over soon._

He came to her cowering form. "What? You can't handle a little slap?" He asked, laughing that cold laugh. He hit her again, this time harder. He punched her finally, but in the arm. He didn't want to leave a clearly visible mark. He began beating her violently, kicking her as she fell to the floor in pain. She began crying, silently of course.

_No! NO!_ She silently screamed. These words could never be said outside her mouth, unless she wanted more of…this. She didn't.

He continued for a few moments before leaving, going to a bar. He always went and got drunk after and "incident." That's what he calls them anyway. He goes and gets drunk to forget about it.

As soon as Angel heard the start of the engine and the car drive away, she let out her sobs. She couldn't take this anymore. The constant abuse, it was just too much.

Angel got up slowly, wincing from the pain, walked over to the freezer and grabbed an ice pack. She walked up to her bathroom and began running the hot water. She always iced the injuries before getting into the hot water. It's just what followed a beating. She would sit in there until she heard the car. It always took him a good fifteen, twenty minutes to get into the house after being a bar. She would quickly get out of the tub and jump into bed, pretending to be sleeping so he would leave her alone. Then the tears would come, until sleep claimed her.

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Angel glanced at the ground when the man, Jason, approached her. How could this be happening? He moved, to someplace in Ohio. At least that's what she thought.

He came up to her. "Angel? Wow…didn't think I'd run into you here. What have you been up to?" He asked, sneering at her.

She cringed. "Oh, I've just been meeting up with my friends. Nothing really. Jason, I've got to go; one of my friends is waiting for me." She told him and then turned to walk away.

He grabbed her arm harshly. "Oh no you don't. We have some things we need to 'discuss,'" he said, dragging her down the alley that she did not want to end up in.

Post: Next chapter, Angel and Jason have a talk.

Side Note: I'm going away for a couple of days, so I won't be able to update!


	3. Chapter 3

Note: First of all, I want to say thank you to everyone who has read this fic and a special thanks to those who are reviewing! Thanks so much!

And, don't hate me for this chapter! I'm sorry already—don't hate me! And I'm back for a few days and have written a few chapters so I will post ASAP! Thanks and keep RR!

Jason held Angel's arm tightly as he pulled her into the alley. He had that smirk again. The one he always wore before and "incident." The one he _knew_ frightened Angel.

Angel just stared at him, as she allowed herself to be dragged into the alley. She wasn't even trying to fight back…she couldn't. He was leading her like a lamb to the slaughter.

Once they were out of sight, he threw her away from him, causing her to hit the wall. The small drag queen's body connected with the wall with a sickening thud.

Angel remained motionless for a few moments. She kept her body pressed up against the wall as the harsh rush of pain washed over her. She winced as she pulled herself from the wall, forcing herself to look at him. "Wh-What do you want?" She stammered out, gripping the side of her head.

Jake laughed dryly as he shook his head. "Nice to see you too babe." He looked at her and tilted his head to the side. "Don't I get a kiss from my boyfriend?"

Angel stared at him, trying to figure out what was going through his head. "Uh…we're not together anymore."

He laughed again. Angel was shocked. What was there that was funny? She couldn't think of anything.

He smirked and walked over to her. "Well, we can change that…" he said while he ran his hand up and down her arm.

She took s step away from him, shaking her head. "No. I don't want to." She told him, a tone of confidence in her voice.

He stepped towards her, closing the gap between them, and began rubbing her arm. "_I_ want to." He laughed. "What? You got a boyfriend or something?"

Angel looked down, not saying a word. She was not going to drag Collins into this. Jason took that silence as a yes. He grabbed her arm harshly, forcing her to face him. "Who is he?" He screamed, tightening his grip on her arm.

A frightened Angel shook her head, wincing from the pain. "No…no one," she lied.

He slapped her across the face. "Don't you lie to me!" Angel lost her balance slightly at the slap. She grabbed her face as Jason closed the gap between them again.

He grabbed both her arms and shook her. He opened his mouth to say something, but closed it quickly since her heard voices. Jason looked back at Angel and whispered, "If you were smart, you'd come back with me. I'll be seeing you around." He pushed her out of his way and ran she two people came around the corner.

Post: Please review, and don't hate me too much! I promise that Jason will get what he deserves—later!


	4. Chapter 4

Note: I'm so happy that a lot of you like my story! Thanks, and keep reading. The chapters will get longer, I promise. But this one will be another semi-short one. I had to break before the next chapter! Keep R&R! Also, when there are sentences in italics, those are thoughts! Just to let you all know!

Angel watched him go in shock. As soon as he was out of sight, she ran. The drag queen ran back to her apartment in a weak and frightened state. She was just about to burst through the door, but stopped. Collins. If he saw her like this, he would know something was wrong, and right now, she didn't want him too. At least, not until she had calmed down.

She slowly opened the door, calling out. "Collins? Honey, are you home?"

When there was no response, she sighed, relieved. She didn't need, or want him to get involved. Jason, he…knew what he was doing. Angel didn't want Collins to get hurt, not because of her.

She quickly went to the kitchen to grab an ice pact for her head. Angel pressed the ice pack against the side of her face. The cooling sensation was instant relief to her throbbing head.

Angel walked into the bathroom, locking the door. She started to run the hot water, getting it ready for a bath. She kept the ice pack pressed against her head as the bathtub filled with water. It was amazing how quickly she got back into her old routine. She quickly slipped out of her clothes after turning off the water.

The drag queen gasped at her reflection. The side of her face was red where she'd been thrown against the wall and slapped. Her whole left side was red and there was clearly a large bruise beginning to form. That's when noticed her arms. There were dark marks on both her arms from where Jason had grabbed her.

She couldn't look at herself anymore. It was too painful; bringing up old memories. Those were painful memories that she had tried to forget. Unfortunately she failed at that.

Angel quickly got into the bathtub. The heat washed over her, relaxing her muscles. She was laying back relaxing when she recalled what he said. 'I'll be seeing you.'

_What did he mean by that? Is he going to follow me? Stalk me? Oh my god! Is he going to be a stalker? God knows, if he was desperate enough, he could do anything._ She sighed. _No…he was just being Jason. An asshole who liked to install fear in people._

She relaxed slightly, satisfied with her answer, laying back again. It was useless to get herself worked up over this. Jason was always doing stupid things like this.

'If you were smart, you'd come back with me.' His voice ran through her head, causing her shoot up quickly. Her breaths were quick and shallow.

_Wait…does he want me back? Why? All he ever did was…hurt me. It doesn't matter anyways, I said no. Then again, when has my 'no' stopped him before? _Her thoughts shifted to Collins, which was getting herself more worked up. _Jason can't possibly know who Collins is…right? He's never seen him. At least, I don't think so. Jason wouldn't do anything. Oh god! Of course he will…he's Jason. What have I gotten myself…and Collins into?_

She got out of the bathtub thinking to herself, _So much for relaxing._

She wandered into her bedroom. A drag outfit did not sound appealing right now. All she wanted was comfort. She got out a pair of sweat pants and t-shirt—long sleeve, of course, so no one could see the bruises.

Angel walked out and flopped down onto the couch, reaching for the remote. She turned on the TV and aimlessly started flipping through channels.

That man had reinstalled a fear in her. No matter how much she told herself that he couldn't find her, or Collins, she kept glancing over her shoulder. She would look at the locked door and window. She couldn't help the feeling that one time she looked over at the window or door…he'd be there.

Post: Please Review! I hope you like it! Next chapter, a look at Angel and Jason's relationship, through flashbacks. It's going to be longer, I think at least!


	5. Chapter 5

Note: Thank you so much for reading! And Reviewing! You all who review literally make my day! Thanks. Flashback Chapter. I want, hope, that you guys sort of understand why Angel fell in love with Jason—even though you already know he's, for lack of a better term, an ass.

Italics in this chapter are the flashbacks!

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Angel had sat there, in that room for hours just thinking. She thought about she was going this…situation.

No one knew about Jason, and she wasn't about to tell anyone. It was something she was ashamed of. No necessarily that she'd been with him, an abusive boyfriend, because that happens to other people. She was ashamed of the fact that she stayed with him for three years, even though he was abusive.

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_Angel Dumott Schunard was out buying a new skirt. Tonight she was going out. She was in an amazing mood. Then again, she always was when she went shopping!_

_Angel had stopped to get an ice cream. It had to be the hottest day in May…ever! As she was paying, she glanced up and caught a man's eye. She smiled at the man. He was extremely attractive. He was tall, had dark blonde, and electric green eyes._

_He smiled back and walked over to her. "Hi there beautiful. I'm Jason," the man, Jason, said with a deep voice._

_Angel blushed when he called her beautiful, but smiled at him. Some people might have found it too forward that he said that their first meeting, but not Angel. She thought it was sweet and romantic. "Hi yourself," she said flirtatiously. "I'm Angel." She stuck out her hand for him to shake, but held took it in both of his hands. He brought it to his lips and gently kissed it. Angel giggled and looked down, trying to hide her blush._

_Jason smiled and let go of her head. "I understand if this is too fast for you, but what are you doing tomorrow night?" _

_She shook her head and said, deciding to 'play dumb,' "Nothing, why?"_

_He laughed, gently. "Well…I was..uh..wondering if you..may be you would want to go out sometime…with me…like may be to dinner?" He said, his nerves clearly getting to him._

_Angel smiled, touched by his nerves. "Sure, I'd love to. Here's my number." She wrote her number on a napkin from ice cream vendor. She handed it to him, smiling._

_Jason returned her smiled, taking the napkin from her. "I'll call you," he promised. He leaned in and kissed her cheek gently._

_Angel smiled and nodded. "Okay." He smiled and said, "Okay," before he turned around and walked away._

He had called. That night actually. Just like he said he would. He was so sweet. Such a gentleman their first date.

He had picked her up, getting out and opening the door to his car for her. Pulling out her chair for her. Just little things like that. He did things like that for their first two months together, until they moved in together.

_Jason was sitting on the couch, his arms wrapped around Angel. They were whispering sweet little things to each other and sharing kisses. They were just enjoying each other's company. _

_Jason stopped, suddenly. He looked at Angel. "Babe…we need to talk."_

_Angel was, of course, immediately worried. "Honey, what is it? What's wrong?"_

_He smiled and held both her hands in his. "Nothing is wrong…it can never be wrong…not when I've got you." She smiled at his words and continued. "But I do want to tell you something. Whenever I'm not with you, I can't stop thinking about you. Every night I want to fall asleep with you in arms. And wake up the same way." He sighed and continued. "Babe…I want you to—if you want to, that is, move in here…with me." He looked up at her, a slight fear in his eyes, waiting for her to respond._

_Her smile widened. "Of course. I'd want nothing more." He leaned in and kissed Angel gently. _

_  
He sighed and smiled. "You have no idea how happy that makes me." He told her before her again._

As soon as she moved in with him, she noticed differences with the way acted. He had certain…tendencies, so to speak. Like, how began to get irritated or upset over every little thing. She would not be cooking dinner by the time he got home, she'd be in the bathroom too long, or she'd watch a stupid talk show. He would get upset over stupid, little things like that. He would yell for a while at her, then he'd be gone to the bar, saying something about how he needed some time to relax. He would always come home, apologizing, saying how he was stressed at work, or something similar.

After a few weeks like that, he started getting…abusive. A slap here, the occasional time when he'd grab her arms, shake her, or thrown her down. That one was the worst, when he'd throw her down. It was always against the wall, or directly to the floor. Whichever was easier for him to do at the time.

He'd always come back from the bar, drunk, and with some excuse for his behavior. Angel forgave him every time, truly believing him when he said that this time was going to be the last. A month after this 'occasional' hit, he got worse. He'd beat her for just about every little thing. Especially any contact with her friends and family. She'd learned that one that hard way.

_Angel was sitting at home, waiting for Jason. More so waiting to see what type of mood he was in. She began pacing the floor, worrying. Waiting. Worrying. How would he react? She'd never really talked to anyone before, but when she had ran into an old friend while they were out, her hadn't liked it. Not at all. He told her that she shouldn't be talking to anyone besides him._

_A car door slammed in the distance, followed by a front door slam. Angel winced, knowing what type of mood Jason was in. Footsteps echoed throughout the house, and finally into the kitchen, where Angel was. 'Here goes nothing,' she thought helplessly._

"_Hey honey. How was your day?" She asked, forcing a smile and walking over to him. She leaned in to kiss him on the cheek, but he pulled away. _

"_Fine." He said coldly._

_Angel sighed and walked back to the counter to finish preparing their dinner. "So my friend called today. She's getting mar—"_

"_What! You're friend called? And what did you two talk about?" He asked, a fire burning in his green eyes._

"_Nothing…she just called to tell me that she's getting married," She stammered out as he walked over to her. She knew he didn't like it when she talked to other people, but she just hadn't expected him to get angry. It was just so…irrational. But she knew she could never say that, unless she wanted to end up in the hospital._

"_You…you…lying bitch!" He yelled as he slapped her across the face. He stared down at her. He was taller than her to begin with, but Angel had slouched over from the pain. "How many times do I have to tell you; you don't talk to anyone. There's no need to." He screamed at her. Just as Angel was wondering why he wouldn't want her to talk to anyone, he yelled, "Did you tell her anything about us?" _

_Angel stared back at him, holding her face. So that's why. May be he was ashamed of the way he was…unlikely. He probably just didn't want his personal life to be public, even if it was only to one person. "I..I didn't," She said, her voice barely above a whisper. She had begun shaking slightly from fear of what he was going to do._

_Jason shook his head. "Don't you lie to me!" He yelled before punching her in the face, knocking her to the ground. He began beating her harshly. His fists were flying around and landing on her just about everywhere they could. Soon his feet began the same 'dance' as his fists had done moments earlier._

Angel was screaming and crying, trying to block her face from the blows. "NO! I didn't…I swear! I..I." She couldn't finish. The pain was becoming overwhelming.

_Jason stood up, brushed himself off and walked away. They both knew where he was going. She just laid there on the ground as she listened to the engine of his car start and drive away._

_She began sobbing. Why? What was going on with him? He'd never been this bad before. And it was just one little phone call. She continued to sob, with only the comfort of a cold hard floor._

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_Later that night, Jason had come home unexpectedly early. Angel had just gotten out of the bathtub. She was in sweats and a t-shirt. She wasn't going to pretend to be asleep like she normally does. It was too early, it was like 6 o'clock. She was sitting on the couch when a drunken Jason stumbled through the door. He ran over to her. "Babe…I'm so sorry…I don't know what came over me. I was stupid and out of line. Will you forgive me? I promise that was the last time." He was slurring his words together and smelled heavily of alcohol._

_Angel sighed. She didn't want to upset him when he was drunk. And who knows, may be this was the last time. She smiled weakly. "Yeah." _

_He smiled and kissed her. She didn't kiss him back. She moved away. "Not right now Jason." She told him firmly. He didn't get the message. He kissed her, his hand on the back of her head. He was forcing her to kiss him. What was he doing?_

She sifted her head. "No Jason. Stop…okay? I'm not in the mood. Not now." She said.

_When she moved her head, he began kissing her neck. "But I am," he said, his lips pressed against her neck. _

_She shook her head. "No, stop it!" She said, trying to get away from him. She tried to get up but he grabbed her, not letting her go anywhere. He literally dragged her into the bedroom. She was no match for his strength, not when he was drunk. He started ripping off her clothes. She was horrified. "Stop it! Jason! No! Just stop!" She was yelling now, getting slightly hysterical. _

_He didn't stop. He tore off her clothes and pushed her onto the bed. He was grinning wickedly. She didn't like the look in his eyes. She tried fighting back, hitting hit where she could consider he was sitting on her. He wasn't even fazed a little bit when she tried fighting back._

_Angel continued to fight back, using all her energy. "What the hell s the matter with you! I told you to stop!" She screamed, feeling the burn of tears behind her eyes as she realized what he was doing. _

_Jason stopped long enough to slap her and yell, "Don't you ever talk to me like that again, you bitch!" _

_He grabbed both her wrists in one hand and forced himself into her harshly. She was screaming now, this wasn't supposed to be happening! "Get off me Jason! Now! Stop!" _

_This…drunk, he wasn't Jason anymore, just smirked and kept going. He increased his pace, hurting Angel. She realized that trying to fight back was useless. She was being rapped…by a person who said he loved her. She just sobbed until he was done. She hoped that this is the only time this would happen. But…it was the first time of many, unfortunately. _

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Angel was crying just remembering everything. How could she have let herself go through this? She should have left him before he had a chance to do that. She quickly wiped her eyes and quickly glanced at the clock, 4:30.

Collins normally comes home around five. She sat there thinking to herself. _What am I going to do about this? About Collins?_

Angel thought about this all for a while before she finally decided what to do. She wouldn't tell him…not yet anyways. Especially not about Jason. She couldn't tell him that Jason, apart from being an abusive ex, had run into her today, hit her once or twice…and threatened her. She just couldn't.

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Post: I hope you guys enjoyed this look into Angel/Jason's past. I'm sorry for making Angel go through all of this…but it adds drama! Well, please review and will update ASAP! Thanks


	6. Chapter 6

Hello to all my loyal readers and reviewers! Thanks so much for actually reading this! Okay in this chapter: Collins! Yeah! A little of Collins/Angel fluff, but a little serious too. Not going to give it all away! Hope you like!

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Angel jumped at the sudden noise: keys in the lock. Collins! She had been sitting here, freaking herself out for the past thirty minutes or so. She just kept thinking Jason would come here.

Angel had decided not to mention anything. Everything was okay…nothing happened. It was a chance meeting, a cruel twist of fate. It wouldn't happen again. Right?

Collins opened the door, smiling as usual. He was happy to be back home with his Angel. He saw her sitting on the couch. "Hey baby!" He called to her.

At this, Angel smiled and jumped up to meet him. She ran and threw her arms around his neck. She quickly glanced over his shoulder at the door—it was locked. As much as she tried to deny it, she was terrified. Terrified of the possibility of seeing Jason again. She held Collins close, looking for comfort and love, but most importantly: protection.

Collins kissed her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He looked up and down her outfit. He laughed gently. "How was your day baby? And what's with the sweats?" He asked, smiling. He tightened his grip on her. She seemed…fragile right now. May be it was because of her clothes, but either way, he wanted to make sure she was okay.

Angel laughed. "I just took a bath and wanted to be comfortable," she said shrugging, which was a little hard considering her arms were around his neck. She smiled. "Oh…it was alright. How was yours?"

Collins smiled and kissed her. "It's better now that I'm with you." She smiled and kissed him at this.

Collins laughed and started to let go of Angel. Angel unwillingly let go of his neck, but put her arm around his waist. She glanced nervously towards the window. Why did she keep doing this to herself? He didn't know where she lived. She was just torturing herself right now.

Collins noticed this, of course, and asked. "Baby, are you okay?" He asked gently, while putting his arm around her protectively.

Angel forced a smile. "Yeah sweetie. Why?" _He couldn't know. Not now. I don't want to worry him over nothing. What am I going to do? I can't lie to him. May be—_

Her thinking had been interrupted by Collins pulling her towards the couch. He sat down and pulled her next to him, his arm still around her. He knew something was up. He could tell that she didn't want to talk about it. Not now anyways. But he was going to try. "Well, for starters, you've barely said anything since I've gotten home, which is so not you. Normally you're overflowing with little things to tell me. And not that I'm complaining, but you haven't let me go since I walked in here." He shifted slightly, allowing her to lean into his chest. She did, and he wrapped both his arms around her.

Angel looked down and didn't answer him. As she looked down, she noticed her hand was gripping his leg. She hadn't even noticed. Was she that afraid?

Collins tried again. "Come on baby…you know you can tell me anything," he said gently. He looked at her, her head looking down. He sighed and placed his hand gently under her chin. He pushed her face up so he was looking in her eyes.

Angel thought to herself as she looked into Collins' eyes. _Well, may be if I tell him a little bit, not the entire thing…he could help me. I won't tell him about Jason, or what he did to me…but may be just something happened. But what?_ She sighed. "I..I…some guy was harassing me a little," she said quietly. There, that wasn't a lie. Jason had harassed her.

Collins immediately tensed at that thought. He hated when anyone said anything to his Angel that was mean, even rude comments made him upset. "Do you know you _he_ was?" He asked, his voice was gently yet mixed with anger. Especially when he said the word 'he.' Collins knew Angel was always so damn concerned with everyone else that she never protected herself. That's why he was here. To protect her…when he could.

Angel shrugged, starting to shake slightly. She always did at the memories; sometimes even talking about him freaked her out. "No..no…I don't know him." She whispered. She felt the burn of tears behind her eyes and before she could force them back, they spilled over. The tears streamed down her face. She sat there crying over everything. Jason. Why she never left. What he did to her. What he was doing to her right now. Just…everything.

All the anger Collins felt was immediately replaced with concern when he saw Angel break down. "Shh..baby…it's okay.." He said soothingly. He pulled her into his lap, holding her close. She rested her head on his chest. He rubbed her back gently and rocked her slowly. "Baby…it's alright…let it okay." He gently kissed her forehead, "I'm here when you want to talk," he said quietly.

He knew how Angel worked. Sometimes she wanted to talk about it right away, other times she wanted to just cry. He hated seeing her cry, on any occasion, but knew sometimes that this showing of emotion helped her. He just held her and comforted her the only way he knew how: letting her cry, holding her, and kissing her, gently letting her know that he was here.

Angel clutched the front of Collins' shirt in her hands as she sobbed into his chest. She realized that this was the first time she had cried over Jason, and had something more comforting than a hard, cold floor.

After a few minutes of Angel crying, she finally started to calm down. She sniffed every so often. She didn't look up at him, she couldn't. Not yet. Angel just held his shirt and let him comfort her. She sighed and took a deep shaky breath. "I'm sorry…for this," she croaked out.

Collins shook his head. "Don't be, you have nothing to apologize for, okay?" He told her. He noticed she wasn't looking at him. He wanted her to, but wasn't going to press it. "Are you okay baby? What did he do to you?" he said all this gently, but the last question came with traces of a threat. It was just his overprotective nature.

Angel shook her head. She instinctively tugged her shirt down; making sure that none of her skin was showing. Then reached out and crossed her arms over her chest, placing her hands on the marks on her arms that were under her shirt. "Yeah…I'm alright. He just said things to me. You know the typical things."

He held her closer and kissed her forehead again. "Baby…I'm so sorry that you have to go through all this. People just can't see that you truly are an angel," he told her. She smiled weakly at this, which caused Collins to smile. This was a good sign. He could normally tell how bad it was by the time it took Collins to get Angel to smile.

He thought for a moment. "You okay now?" Angel nodded her head, which was still up against his chest. He smiled at her. "Good."

They stayed like that for a while. Collins just held Angel, and she was just happy for the protection that he gave her, even without knowing it. He shifted his position. "Oh shit." Collins muttered out.

Angel looked at him. She was slightly confused. "What wrong honey?"

He sighed. "Mark, Maureen, Joanne, and Roger are coming over tonight. We planned this a few days ago." He said, and then he looked at Angel. "I'll just call them and tell them tonight's not going to work." He reached for the phone, but Angel stopped him.

"What do you mean?" Angel asked him. "I'm sure everything will be fine."

Collins shook his head. "I don't think you'd want visitors tonight. That's fine. It can just be us." He told her smiling.

She smiled back at him, but shook her head. "No, don't worry baby. I'm fine now. I just need you…and your comfort," she told him, nuzzling her face into his chest again.

He smiled. "If you're sure." He told her, the worry obvious in his voice. He hated that he always worried for her, but it was just natural. He loved her more than anything and he hated that he could not always be there to protect her.

She nodded. "Yes I'm sure. What time are they coming?" She asked.

Collins laughed. "Uh… actually any minute." He told her.

"Okay," she told him, smiling. She thought about getting up and changing, but that would mean leaving Collins. She wasn't normally like this, but Jason stayed at the back of her mind. No, she would just stay in her sweats. At least she'd be comfortable. "What are we doing then?" She asked him.

Collins shrugged. "I'm not sure exactly. Maureen said she was bringing movies and the food, so that means so is Joanne. And that leaves Roger and Mark with drinks, not like they're complaining though," he said, laughing slightly. She laughed with him.

She jumped at the pounding on the door. Collins looked worried again. "Are you sure you're okay?" She just nodded, and smiled. "Okay," he said as he helped Angel up and walked to the door. Angel had grabbed onto his arm. Something was up. He knew it. He loved that him and Angel were always holding each other in some way, but this time it felt…like she was holding onto him for dear life.

Collins and Angel walked to the door. He threw it open. There stood everyone, except Mimi who had to work. He laughed. "Hey guys! It's good to see you again!" He said as he reached out to take things from Joanne, whom it looked as though Maureen had made carry everything.

Joanne smiled at him. "Thanks Collins." She said as she handed him a bag filled with food.

Collins shrugged. "It's no problem." He set the food down and went to hug Joanne, followed by Maureen who had started to tell her story about some cute waiter down at the coffee shop asking for more details about her upcoming protest. He gave Roger and Mark a quick hug.

Angel had let go of Collins as he helped Joanne. She had gone over and hugged Maureen, then Mark, then Joanne, and finally Roger. She walked back over to Collins and grabbed his hand. He squeezed it gently. "So, what are we doing first?" She asked.

Maureen jumped up and down. "I can give you a little preview of my protest!" She exclaimed excitedly. Mark had already picked up his camera and had begun to film. He took the camera away from his eye for a brief moment to roll his eyes, which got a laugh out of everyone except Maureen. She ended up joining in the laughter anyways because that was Maureen.

Roger shrugged. "Why don't we just watch a movie? Didn't you bring them Maureen?" He asked.

Maureen nodded. "Yeah! Come on, we can go and watch some of them. Grab the food Pookie!" She called over her shoulder as she had already walked over to the TV. She popped a tape into the VCR and pressed play.

Joanne had grabbed the bag of food, Mark had his camera, and Roger carried the drinks. They all settled down. Maureen and Joanne sharing a chair. Mark in a chair across the room. And Collins, Angel, and Roger all sat on the couch.

They watched the first movie, in a semi-silence. Maureen and Joanne had started a little disagreement. Something about how the guy at the coffee shop wanted more than just protest information.

Angel and Collins shared a look, and then went back to watching the movie. Eventually, Maureen and Joanne stopped their little argument—when the movie was over.

Maureen jumped up and put in another movie. Roger had drunken three cans of beer, a bottle of water—Angel made him do that one, she wanted him to drink something healthy—then he started on a can of Coke. He and Mark had eaten an entire bag of chips. Everyone was just enjoying each other's company.

It was about half way into the second movie, it was about nine-thirty. But Angel was exhausted. She yawned. Collins nudged her and whispered. "Baby, why don't you go to bed? You've had a long day." He said. Angel couldn't help but think, 'You have no idea.'

She just nodded. "Yeah, okay." She stood up. "I'm going to bed guys. Had a long day," she smiled and went and told everyone good night. She came back and kissed Collins. "Don't stay up too late," she told him, smiling as she walked into their bedroom. 

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Angel lay down and tried to fall asleep. She was tossing and turning. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw his face. That cruel face.

She replayed the day's events over and over in her mind. She felt terrible for lying to Collins.

She continued to toss and turn for about a half hour before she realized she wasn't going to be sleeping. She couldn't, not with out Collins. She quietly got up out of her bed and walked out the door. Maureen and Joanne had left already. It was just Mark, Roger, and Collins.

Collins looked up when he saw her. "Hey baby. You okay?" He asked.

She nodded walking over towards him. "Yeah, just couldn't sleep."

He smiled and reached out his hand and helped her into his lap. She snuggled against him as she felt him wrap a blanket around them both. She nuzzles her face into his chest. "What are you watching?" She asked.

Collins shrugged. "I don't really know." He told her laughing. He stopped himself quickly.

She smiled. "You can talk," she told him.

He smiled. "Okay, thank you baby," he whispered to her. He gently kissed her forehead and tightened his arms around her.

She smiled and there, in his arms, she fell asleep. She didn't even think about Jason once. She knew that was because Collins was there. She fell into a peaceful sleep.

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Post: Sorry for updating so soon! I couldn't sleep and just had to write when Collins got back! Next chapter…hm…not sure yet! I'm leaving (again) for about 5 days starting Monday-Saturday. Wait, I think that's 6 days. What ever. I hope you guys enjoy what I have so far. I will try to update as soon as I get back!


	7. Chapter 7

I've finally updated! This chapter has Angel's pov and next chapter will be Collins pov—at least that's what I'm thinking of doing at the present moment! I hope you enjoy!

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Angel awoke the next morning, slightly disorientated. She opened her eyes and saw that she was in her own bed. _Collins must have carried me in here after everyone left._ She smiled at that. Collins was always doing sweet things like that for her.

She sat up quickly, too quickly. Immediately grabbing her side which had started throbbing the moment she sat up. _What the hell—_

She had forgotten, briefly, everything that had happened the night before: seeing Jason and getting "hurt" by him. Angel winced as she slowly got out of her bed. The pain was an intense pain, something she hadn't felt since she had been with Jason.

The weak Angel walked over to her mirror and looked into it. Her face, as expected, didn't show the slightest trace of every being touched. Jason had only slapped her there, not wanting to leave a mark—old habits die hard. Hesitantly, Angel lifted her shirt, gasping at the appearance of her stomach. There was a huge, darkly colored bruise covering her whole left side. There were so many other bruises that they seemed to mend together into one big bruise. She lowered her shirt once again. The bruising on her abdomen was bad enough; she didn't want to see the marks on her arms.

She sighed as she glanced around the room. She realized that it was empty. There was no sleeping Collins on the bed, or any trace of him at all. It was just her. She was alone…all alone. She immediately started to panic.

_He could find me…oh god, what if he has. What if he's waiting in the next room for me?_ Her breaths quickened, coming in short and shallow breaths. Her eyes widened at her next thought: _What if he's in here?_

The drag queen always did this to herself. She was always playing the worst case scenario in her head. Angel was freaking herself out, and she knew it, but wasn't about to stop it.

The quivering form of Angel slowly made its way to the door of the bedroom. Pressing her ear against the door she heard…nothing. Absolute silence. She let out a quick relieved breath, before slowly opening the door. Angel slowly peered out of the door, well the tiny crack between the door and the wall. Glancing around, she saw no one was there. She opened the door and walked out of the bedroom, silently cursing at herself for overreacting like that.

Angel, still afraid that he could be out there, quickly walked to the door, making sure it was locked. She sighed seeing the lock twisted to the side that meant "Locked." She glanced at the window. Was it open? Unsure, she made her way to the window to see that it too was locked. She chuckled at her own overreaction.

The drag queen, now back to her usual self, walked into the kitchen. Angel was going to make a quick breakfast: Cereal. As she walked into the kitchen, a little piece of paper lying on the counter caught her eye. She picked it up, immediately recognizing the writing of her lover. Angel couldn't help but smile as she read over his note.

_Angel,_

_I'm sorry that I had to leave while you were sleeping. I know you told me that I should wake you up when I left, but I couldn't. You had a long day yesterday…I hope you slept alright. Anyways, I'll be home later, around five. I'll see you then! (I can't wait!)_

_Love you, Collins_

Angel gently placed it back on the counter. To most people a little note like this wouldn't mean anything, but not to Angel. It showed just how much Collins cared for her. How he told her how he couldn't wake her, his concern for her about sleeping, and him telling her when he was going to be home, that all made her love him so much more—if that was even possible.

Angel reached into the refrigerator, pulling out the milk. She walked over to the counter and grabbed a bowl, spoon, and a box of cereal. She made herself a bowl of cereal and then went and sat down on a stool by her counter. She couldn't help but smile to herself. It was amazing how just a note from Collins could calm her down.

She quickly finished eating and went to shower, paying extra attention to not look at her in the mirror until she was dressed. She did not want to see…the marks anymore. Angel went a little more casual than usual, wearing just some jeans and a cute pink top. The drag queen gathered enough attention—she didn't want to grab the unwanted today.

She walked back out into her kitchen. After having calmed down, she walked to the door, purse in hand. Angel wanted to go to the loft. Her apartment, as much as she was trying to convince herself otherwise, was not feeling to comforting and secure.

Angel walked out of her apartment quickly and started down the street. As soon as she saw the crowds of people, she began to panic slightly. Was he out here? What happens if she runs into him again?

The now practically running drag queen forced these thoughts from her head. She was being impossible. That was a one in a million chance meeting—it wouldn't happen again. This was starting to get ridiculous.

Angel needed to pull herself together, she was nearing the loft. She couldn't let her friends see her like this. Angel was the centerfold of them, as much as she hated to admit it. They all came to her when they needed someone to listen, a shoulder to cry on or just plain comfort. Angel would never turn anyone away, it was part of her nature, and she honestly didn't mind. But sometimes, it was so hard feeling like the only reason they keep you around is so you can pick up the pieces of every trouble. Sometimes her friends were so busy working on their own problems, they didn't even notice her—that was the worst.

She sighed. Now _this_ was ridiculous. She shook her head and glanced around. Angel gasped and covered her mouth. Jason. Immediately her mind began spinning, but it stayed semi-focused on two thoughts in particular:

_What the hell was he doing here? Was he following me! _

Angel noticed he was coming towards her and she broke out in an all out run towards the loft. She would be safe there. He wouldn't do anything in front of others. As she ran she glanced behind her and noticed he had started after her, almost as quickly.

Angel heart began to race as the realization sunk in: He was following her. She quickly dashed up the stairs and ripped open the door to the loft—thankful it was unlocked. Angel quickly entered and closed the door, locking it, in a slightly quieter manner.

"Pookie…it was just some guy wanting protest information!" Maureen yelled. "I don't see why you are overreacting."

Joanne, glaring at Maureen, said, "He was staring at you the whole time—not anywhere near your eyes! He was flirting with you and you were flirting with him! And you know it Maureen!"

As Maureen started to protest, there was more yelling.

"Roger…come on! It's Benny! You can't honestly think I'd-" Mimi started, but was cut off by Roger.

"Who are you to tell me what I should do… or think?" Roger threw his arms in the air. "I don't even know what to think anymore!" He yelled dramatically.

Mark was sitting quietly in the corner, working on his film. He did not want to get involved in this. Not at all.

Everyone was too busy either arguing or trying to ignore the arguing, they didn't even notice Angel come in. Or the fact that she was shaking while leaning against the door.

Angel couldn't get over the fact that she saw him. Again. _Again!_ This couldn't have been an accident. It just wasn't possible.

Her heart was beating at a million miles per hour. She was dizzily leaning against the back of the door for support. Her head was spinning, literally. Her fear and terror was taking over, and she knew it.

She tried walking towards the couch. She slowly stood up and took a step. She lost her balance, but caught herself as she started to hyperventilate. "Guys…a little help here," She said.

Angel continued trying to walk to the couch. She couldn't focus on anything anymore, except the room spinning. Inside, she was fighting with herself.

_Stop this! You are overreacting. Just calm down. He wasn't following you. It was just a coincidence. You run into people all the time. That's what happens when you live in New York._

Oh my god! How long had he been following me? Does he know where I live? What about Collins? Does he know about Collins? 

She continued the war inside. One half trying to rationalize, the other giving into the fear and paranoia. The latter side was winning.

Angel continued to struggle with getting to the couch, her legs getting weaker and weaker. "Please…someone. Help!" She pleaded again. No one moved, or even acknowledged her.

"You _can't_ be serious pookie! I'm a talkative person! Just because I talk to someone doesn't mean I'm flirting!" Maureen spat out angrily.

"Well then tell me Maureen. What do you qualify as flirting, because apparently we have different definitions!" Joanne yelled right back.

"Roger! Stop acting this way! You are being ridiculous! Benny is just trying to use me against you! Can't you see that!" Mimi yelled, trying to get through to the rocker.

Roger shook his head and laughed dryly. "I'm being ridiculous! If you aren't doing anything with Benny, then why do you constantly go and see him?" He asked Mimi loudly.

Mark was trying to tune them out, but it was obviously not working. He just continued to work on his camera.

Angel struggled to stand straight up. Like usual, everyone was so damn wrapped up in their own problems, they didn't even pay attention to her.

Angel managed to stand up fully. "Guys…I—" She finished her sentence with a loud thud as she hit the floor, unconscious.

All five others in the loft jumped at the sudden noise. "Angel!" Mimi screamed, running over to her friend. Roger came over and eased Angel into his arms and carried her to the couch. "She shouldn't be on the floor." He whispered as he placed her gently on the couch.

When Roger picked Angel up, her shirt hung down loosely. Mark was the only one who noticed a deep purple mark—no it was bigger than a mark, much bigger. It was on the side of her abdomen. Mark immediately looked away. What the hell had happened to Angel?

Mimi had taken her place next to Angel, sitting on the couch. She started caressing her face gently, sisterly, trying to get Mimi to wake up. Maureen and Joanne had stopped fighting and ran over to Angel as well.

"I didn't even hear her come in," Maureen whispered. At that, everyone looked down sheepishly.

Mark cleared his throat. "Uh…I think I should go and call Collins," he told them. He only got a couple of head nods in response.

Mark walked over to the phone and started dialing. He waited patiently as the phone rang. What the hell happened Angel?

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Post: Sorry it took so long! I have been gone! Next chapter, Collins pov! And Mark and Collins have a 'discussion.'

Thank you so much to all of you who have reviewed! You make my life!

Keep reading and reviewing!


	8. Chapter 8

Hello to all my loyal reader and reviewers! I love you all so much! Thank you for caring! I hope you enjoy this chapter! Enjoy! R&R please...thanks!

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Tom Collins sat behind his desk during his fourth period class, thinking while his students were taking an exam. His mind wouldn't think of anything except his Angel.

The professor sat there thinking about last night: the fear in his lover's eyes, the way she didn't let go of him, Angel getting harassed and Collins wasn't there to protect her. But mostly he thought about Angel coming back out of the bedroom to sleep in his lap. He hadn't minded, not at all. But it just…wasn't like Angel. She always liked to be close to him while she slept, as he did with her, but…she never got out of her bed to be near him, unless something happened.

Collins glanced up at the clock. He groaned. There had only been five minutes since the start of the class. He leaned back in his chair and stared up at the ceiling, his mind wandering back to last night.

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_Collins smiled and wrapped his arms around Angel, rubbing her back gently. He kissed the top of her head and then leaned back into the couch. Almost instantly, Angel was asleep. Collins glanced over at Mark and then Roger._

_Roger looked at him and asked. "What's the matter with her?" _

_Collins shrugged. "N-nothing. She just…had a hard day. Why?" He asked Roger._

_Roger sighed. "Collins…what happened? She's seems so…" He began searching for a word that described what she appeared to be._

"_Tramatized," Mark but in, quietly. _

_Roger nodded. "Yeah, that's it."_

_Collins looked down at his sleeping Angel, all his worries and concerns finally confirmed. He knew something was wrong with Angel, something more than she was letting on. But he figured, after she told him that she had just been harassed, that it was just his overprotectiveness. But now, Roger and Mark made it clear that his instincts were right._

"_Collins?" Mark asked hesistantly. "What happened? Is everything alright?"_

_Collins nodded. "Yeah…I think so…I don't know!" He told them._

_Roger looked at him. "What do you mean?" He asked gently. Yeah, Roger can be a tough guy, but he cares deeply for his friends and those he loves—it's just sometimes he doesn't show it in the right way._

_Collins sighed. "I came home today and she was just…not herself. I asked what was wrong and she said nothing. I knew that wasn't true…so she finally told me that she…she had been harassed today," he said quietly, his voice heavy with emotion. He always felt guilty that he wasn't there to protect her when things like this happen, but at the same time upset that these things happen to Angel. His Angel._

_Mark sighed. "I'm sorry Collins. Is she…alright?"_

_Collins shrugged. "She says she is, but I don't think so. And you guys just proved that I'm right." _

_Roger looked at him, obviously confused. "Wait…how did we help?" _

_Collins sighed. "You two noticed how different she was acting tonight. At first I thought it was just my worry, but when you guys said something about it…I knew I was right."_

_Mark nodded. "Okay. So what are you going to do about it?" _

_Collins shrugged. "I don't know. I think I'll try talking to her tomorrow. May be then, she'll feel like she can tell me." He said, while looking down at Angel, who was still sleeping._

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_After Roger and Mark left, Collins carried Angel into their room, setting her gently on the bed. He quickly got changed into his sweatpants and old t-shirt. Collins gently climbed into bed, not wanting to disturb Angel, and wrapped his arms around her._

_He held her close as she tossed and turned. It was clear she was having either a disturbing dream, or something was on her mind. That's what happens when Angel moves around a lot while sleeping. _

_Collins honesly didn't know what to do, except hold her close to him. She finally relaxed and he fell asleep soon after she did._

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The professer was shaken away from his thoughts by the shrill sound of the bell. The whole class went to the front of the room and set their exams on his desk. Collins just smiled and nodded to the students as they left his classroom.

He relaxed back in his chair, still worried about Angel. He felt guilty for leaving her this morning. He wanted to be able to be there, hold her, let her know that he was here for her, no matter what. He just wanted her to be comfortable enough to tell him what really happened.

Collins was once again lost in thought when his phone rang. He picked it up and said. "Hello?"

There was a slight pause. Before Mark finally answered. "Hey Collins…what's going on?" There was a clear worry in his voice and he sounded…afraid?

Collins smiled. "Hey Mark. Uh…nothing." He sighed. "Mark…what's wrong?"

Mark paused. He didn't want Collins to be worried, although he would be no matter what. Mark didn't want Collins to be upset that _no one_ noticed Angel…and the condition she was in. "Nothing...something. Look, can you just come over here…quickly."

Collins' heart immediately began to race. "What happened Mark?" He asked, the desperation in his voice.

Mark sighed. "It's Angel…she's…she passed out. We think she's okay but—"

Collins cut him off. Actually he just hung up the phone and got up. His mind could only focus on one thing as he rushed out of the buiding. Angel, his Angel, was hurt. End of story.

Collins started into a run as soon as he hit the side walk. NYU wasn't that far from the loft, but he wanted to—no, needed to get there as soon as possible.

After what seemed like hours, which was actually minutes, Collins was at the door to the loft, banging on it. "It's Collins." He called to them.

Roger came and opened the door. Collins was panting and out of breath from running. "You look like hell," Roger stated, which got a hit on the arm from Mimi.

Collins glanced around the room and saw Angel still lying on the couch, unconscious. He rushed to her side, pulling her into his arms. He leaned into the corner of the couch, holding her tightly, kissing her face and head. He just wanted her to wake up.

Everyone in the loft was silent. Collins sat there holding an unconscience Angel; Mark, Mimi, Roger, Maureen, and Joanne were just standing there. They all were completely ashamed by the fact that they had been too busy fighting to even notice Angel.

After a long while Collins looked up. "What happened?" He whispered.

Mimi took the lead. "Uh…well…we all were just…hanging out here and Angel came in. She seemed fine, so we all went back to what we were doing. The next thing you know, Angel's on the floor." She told him.

Collins just nodded his head. Mark had been thinking about the bruise he had seen on Angel. He cleared his throat. "Collins…could I talk to you in the kitchen…alone."

Collins nodded again and gently got up and placed Angel on the couch. Mimi immediately rushed to her side, pressing up against Angel's side. Collins and Mark walked into the kitchen, Mark trying to calm down before he told Collins what he saw; he knew Collins wouldn't react well. Then again, who did when they found out the person they love has been hurt?

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Next Chapter: Mark tells Collins about Angel's injury.

Please…review! If you have any suggestions or things you'd like me to try and add, let me know! I will try my hardest to add them…as long as they go with the story! That goes with other story ideas as well! Just let me know!


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I'm not, nor will I ever be Jonathan Larson, therefore I do not, and can not own RENT or anything affiliated with it!

I saw a few people write those, I figured I should put one in!

In this chapter: Italics means thoughts (for Collins) or Angel's dream while she is unconscious. You'll understand, hopefully, as you read! Enjoy!

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Tom Collins had always been a little, okay a lot overprotective of those he loved. Not very many people had loved him or cared about him, so he wasn't going to take any one who did for granted. He never wanted them to get hurt…or anything.

Mark led the way into the kitchen, quietly. He was wondering how he was going to tell Collins what had happened. What he saw. The bruise. Mark shuddered at the thought of it. He knew it must be a huge bruise, considering how clearly it showed. His nerves where increasing as he heard Collins, trying to calm down.

Collins just followed Mark into the kitchen. What could possibly make this day any worse? Well, Collins was about to find out.

Collins was cursing at himself inwardly. _I shouldn't have left her. She needed me…and I failed her. No she's…she's…_

Mark interrupted his thoughts by saying, "Collins…what exactly happened to Angel last night?"

Collins just stared at him. Where had this come from? Angel was lying on the couch, unconscious, and Mark wanted to talk about yesterday? "Uh…I already told you, she said she had been harassed, someone calling her names and things. If that's all I want to get back to—"

"That's not all. Not even close," Mark said. Collins started at him, giving him a look that said: 'What the hell is going on in that head of yours? "I don't think she's telling you the entire story."

Collins stared at him. "What do you mean?" He asked him.

"Uh…I saw something…that made me worry." Mark sighed.

Collins looked down. His own breathing was becoming shallow. Mark rarely worried, yet he was worried enough to come and talk to Collins about something. This all was getting Collins…nervous. Scared even. Collins cleared his throat. "Wh-what did you see," he whispered, as if afraid of the answer.

It was Mark's turn to look down. "Angel's whole side was bruised. A dark purplish color." He said, not looking up to see Collins expression.

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_Jason was walking towards Angel. Dragging her into the alley, like he'd done just last night. Except tonight was different. Collins was there, except it wasn't Collins. It was Jason's eyes, the cold ones that burn, on Collins' face, not the warm, loving, and gentle ones she was used to. _

_  
"Collins," Angel whispered. He was going to help her this time. Jason wasn't going to get to her. Collins would protect her. _

_Collins just stared at her, in that cold icy way that Jason did. He didn't respond. _

Jason continued to drag Angel into the alley, smirking. He found this entire thing funny. 

_Angel looked back and forth between Collins and Jason. "What's going on?" She asked. _

_  
Jason looked at her. "Oh…something that's long overdue," He told her. Angel stared at him, getting more and more afraid every moment. Angel tugged free of his grasp and ran to Collins. She grabbed his arm. "Collins…what's going on?" She asked, begging him to tell her. _

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Collins head snapped up. "What!" He couldn't have heard correctly, could he?

Mark sighed. "Angel's whole side is bruised. I saw it when Roger picked her up and laid her on the couch. It was…horrible. It was huge and a deep dark purple." He said.

Collins just stared at him. "No…no," he said while shaking his head. "I…it…she can't be…hurt. No." Collins stated. He did not want to accept the fact that his Angel had been hurt.

Mark looked at him. "Collins…why would I lie to you about something like this? Look, I'm sorry… I didn't know how to tell you—"

Mark was cut off by Collins slamming his fist on the counter. "Damn it!" he yelled as his fist connected to the counter. He didn't even notice the throbbing pain in his hand. He was cursing at himself. How could he have been so stupid? He rubbed his face with his hands.

Mark was shocked by Collins. He had never seen him so worked up over something. "Collins…are you okay?" He asked, unsure of what else to say.

Collins shook his head. "No I'm not okay! I was trying so hard to be there for her, to get her to tell me what was wrong! And I didn't even notice that she was…that she had…" Collins started out as yelling, but her broke into a sob at the last phrase.

Collins pulled himself together. "I fell awful, for not noticing that she was hurt. What kind of person does that make me?" He said quietly.

Mark now felt incredibly guilty. Here was a distraught Collins who was upset because he didn't notice something that Angel had clearly hidden from him. But yet here he was, here everyone else was, not even noticing she entered the room, let alone wasn't feeling well. Mark sighed. "Collins…it isn't your fault. She hid it from you—" He tried, but Collins wasn't going to hear it, any of it.

He shook his head firmly. "No…I should have noticed something wasn't right. Now look at what happened." Collins had tears rolling down his face. He pressed both his palms on the counter, leaning on it for support. Mark stood there unsure of what to do. "Mark…what if she doesn't wake up," he whispered. Mark didn't know how to respond, so he just patted Collins back, trying to say everything he wanted to say without words.

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_Angel clung to Collins' arm as Jason approached her. "He won't help you…who would?" Jason asked, tauntingly. He started towards her again._

_What was going on? Why wasn't Collins doing anything? She looked up at him, pleading, "Collins…baby…what's going on? Please…don't let him—" _

She was cut off by a slap across the face from Jason. She grabbed her face. "Jason, what are you do—" Angel was cut by a shove to the ground. She lay on the cold ground, staring up at Jason, and then she shifted her gaze to Collins. He was just standing there. Why wasn't he doing anything? She looked at Collins, and it was clear…this wasn't Collins. It couldn't be... he would be doing something...right? She started sobbing. "Collins…what's going on?" She cried out. 

_Jason smirked while Collins remained emotionless. "He's finally seeing what you are…and what you deserve," Jason told her, as if it was obvious. "Collins here finally realizes you're worthless and deserve nothing, except this." He kicked her in the stomach._

Angel began screaming. "No…what are you talking about?"

_Jason looked up at Collins and smiled wickedly. "Ready man?" He asked Collins._

_Collins nodded grimly and took a step forward. For the first time, Angel didn't see the love and kindness in her lover's eyes. Instead she saw cold hatred in his eyes, like she used to see in Jason's. Collins pulled his foot back and kicked her in the side…_

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Angel screamed. There was a massive amount of pain in her side. She pushed it away and off of her, which would mean she pushed Mimi off of her side. She couldn't see anything, because her eyes weren't focusing.

Then she remembered. The dream…Collins…Jason…everything. Angel began sobbing, hugging her knees to her chest. Where was she? Was Jason here? What was going on?

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Collins jumped at the sound of Angel's scream. "Angel…" He whispered. Collins ran from the kitchen and was at his lover's side in a heartbeat. He looked at her. Angel's shoulders were shaking, and she looked so fragile. Collins knew she was crying. He approached her and sat down next to her.

Angel didn't know where she was. Her mind was spinning. She moved away from…whoever it was who had sat down beside her. She pulled her knees closer to her chest.

Collins noticed that she had moved. He didn't know what was wrong. May be Mark was right about the whole, there's more to the story than what Angel was saying. "Angel…baby…it's me, Collins," He whispered. "What's the matter baby?"

Angel looked up, her eyes still not in focus, but she would recognize her lover's voice in any circumstance. "Collins," She said her voice barely audible. She fell into him sobbed, clinging to him.

Collins immediately wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer. He gently kissed the side of her head while rubbing her back gently. "Baby…what's wrong?"

Angel pressed her face into the crook of his neck as she cried. "I...I don't know where I am…what's real and what's not…I-I don't know what's going on!' She said through her tears.

Collins pulled her into his lap, keeping his arms around her tiny waist. He kissed her forehead while she kept her head buried in his neck. His heart broke when she started crying like that, even more so when she said those things. "Baby…it's okay. You're with me at the loft…you kind of…passed out, but it's okay now," He told her. "It's okay, you'll be alright." He kissed her forehead again. "You're awake now."

Angel clutched onto him, holding him close. "I had the worst dream…while I was out," She said. "It was my worst nightmare," She whispered. She had been afraid from the beginning that Collins would turn out to be just like Jason.

"It's over now…okay," he told her gently.

"And…when I woke up, there was this pain in my side—" She cut herself off. She had completely forgotten about the fact that Collins didn't know about her "encounter" with Jason. Not fully anyways.

Collins had completely forgotten what Mark had told him, until that comment. He looked up at Mark, who was getting everyone out of the loft. He nodded at Collins, signaling him to ask Angel. Once everyone was out the door, Collins sighed. "Why was there a pain?" He asked cautiously.

Angel tensed immediately. She knew that was coming, but she didn't have an answer for it. "Uh…I'm not sure exactly," She stated. 

Collins felt her tense. He sighed and put a finger under Angel's chin, turning her head to face his. "Angel…you and I both know that you know what happened," He told her. "But you don't have to tell me…as much as I'd like you too," He said sadly. He dropped his finger from under Angel's chin.

Angel looked down. May be Collins could help…some how. The sooner she got it out, the better. "Um…well remember how yesterday I told you I got harassed?"

Collins nodded. "Yes."

"Well…it was a little more than just harassed. I was…beaten."

Collins tensed immediately, anger flooding him. Not towards Angel, it could never be towards Angel, but at whoever it was that did this to her. He would let her continue. "Oh…"

"Well…I told you I didn't know who it was, but I did. It was an ex of mine, Jason." She paused to catch her breath, but continued before Collins could respond. "He and I went out for a while. And he was," she paused, trying to collect herself. "Abusive."

Collins anger flooded from him and was replaced by concern for Angel. "Oh my god. Baby…are you okay? What did he do to you?" He asked her.

Angel shrugged. "Yeah…I'm okay. He only hit me once or twice."

Collins looked at her seriously. "Angel, will you let me take a look. I want to make sure everything's alright."

Angel nodded and slid off Collins' lap. Collins came and kneeled on the floor in front of her. She gently lifted her shirt and saw the look of mortification on Collins' face.

Collins gasped when he saw the bruise. The one covering her whole left side. There were a few others, but that's the one he focused on. He looked up at Angel. "Honey…this doesn't look to good," He said, sitting back down on the couch. "I think we should take you to a hospital."

Angel pulled down her shirt and shook her head, a look of terror on her face. "N-no…I can't go to a hospital…he'll find me," she whispered, a new wave of panic setting in.

It felt to Collins as though his heart was being twisted and mangled every time Angel said something like that. He pulled her into his arms again and stroked her back gently. "Okay…no hospitals. I promise. We'll just go home…he won't get to you, okay. I'll be there." He told her.

Angel was terrified at the moment. Just the thought of him finding her…scared her terribly. She climbed into Collins' lap, clutching him. "O-okay."

"What do you say we head home?" He asked her.

She nodded, not saying a word. All she wanted right now was comfort, security, and most importantly…protection.

Collins helped her up and got up herself. She took a weak and wobbly step forward. She almost fell over if Collins hadn't caught her. He smiled at her, wrapping his arm around her. "Come on…I'll help you," He said. He picked her up into his arms. Their apartment wasn't that far from here, he would carry her there. May be she would feel safer this way.

Angel wrapped one her arms around his neck and clutched his jacket with the other. She hid her face in the crook of his neck. That was in case Jason was out there; he wouldn't recognize her…hopefully.

And with that they made their way home…in silence.

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Next Chapter: Not sure yet! I'll think of something! Probably a lot of Angel/Collins fluff and what not!

What did you guys think? I was a little worried about the whole Angel's dream thing.

Please review! Here's to all those who have reviewed!

Thank you so much for all the great reviews! I'm so happy that you guys like it! I'm sorry for making Angel go through all this.

And to those who wanted to kill Jason in earlier chapters…go ahead! He'll get what's coming to him!


	10. Chapter 10

Angel and Collins walked, well Collins walked as he carried Angel, in silence. Collins didn't want to upset Angel and Angel didn't want to upset Collins. It was a no win situation for both of them. Neither one of them wanted to talk about it, for fear of what the other one would do. But they both knew that they would have to.

Collins was so wrapped up in making sure Angel was okay he didn't notice they were being followed. Neither did Angel, since her face was still buried in Collins' neck…

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They arrived back at their place a little while ago. Angel had changed into sweat pants and a t-shirt, as did Collins. They both knew this was going to be a long night.

Angel was sitting on the edge of their bed when Collins knocked on the door gently. "Baby…can I come in?" He asked softly.

"Yeah…sure," Angel replied.

Collins entered and went to sit next to Angel, then shifted and went to the top of the bed, resting his back against the wall. He held out his hand, motioning for Angel to come to him. She happily obliged, grasping his hand and moving towards him, although she remained a slight (yet significant) distance away from him. She let go of his hand as she leaned against the wall next to him. He could tell she was still slightly uncomfortable with…everything. He placed his hand on her leg, stroking her leg comfortingly. "Angel…sweetie…are you okay?" He asked cautiously. He knew it was a slightly, okay really stupid question to ask, but he wanted Angel to feel comfortable first, before moving on to…well, what happened last night.

Angel attempted a weak smile, but it came out a grimace. "Yeah…I guess." She said softly.

Collins nodded, giving her leg a little squeeze. "Is there anything you want to talk about?" He asked. "Like…what you're feeling, or what happened last night," he suggested, keeping the calm in his voice.

Angel shook her head, then nodded, then sighed and shrugged. "I-I don't know!" She exclaimed, obviously exasperated. She brought her hands to her face, sighing into them.

Collins let go of her leg, which he had been holding, and wrapped an arm around her, pulling her into him. He gently stroked her arm and cooing comforting things in her ear. "Baby…it's okay. You don't have to say anything…" he told her.

The last thing Collins wanted was to make Angel upset or uncomfortable. And as much as he wanted her to tell him what she was thinking, feeling, anything, he wanted her to want to say it.

Angel took her hands away from her face and looked at him. She knew she was feeling so many things but one stood out the most: fear. Angel sighed. "Collins…I..I'm scared," she admitted softly.

Collins heart broke at this. He never wanted Angel to feel this way—not with him around. He said he would always be there to protect her. But all this made him drawer her closer to him. Both his arms were wrapped around Angel as she was practically on top of him. He kissed the top of her head, since that was the only thing he could really reach. "Angel…it's okay to be afraid," he whispered to her.

Angel nodded her head against his chest. "I know Collins. But…why did he, uh, come after me?" She asked him, knowing full well he didn't have an answer for her.

But Collins shrugged. "I don't know baby." He sighed. "I wish I could be more help, but I just—" He was cut off by Angel who had kissed him, covering his mouth with hers.

She smiled and broke the kiss. "You've helped me so much…whether you realize it or not." She told him firmly.

Collins smiled at Angel, unsure of what to really say. But Angel just smiled at him, not caring if he said something or not.

That's what he loved about Angel. No matter what the circumstances, she always made time to show the people around her just how much she cared about them.

Collins shifted so he was lying on the bed. Angel followed in suit, resting her head on his chest. Right now, with him, she felt…safe. She always did when she was with him, and always would.

Collins kissed her gently on the lips and smiled. "You okay now?"

Angel nodded, giving him a reassuring smile. "Yeah."

Collins nodded. "Good, I'm glad."

With one few "I love yous" and about a dozen kisses. They fell asleep.

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Sorry it's so short! I'm suffering from a little bit of writers block! (That's my angry face!) The next chapter will be longer. I just needed a space/time filler! I will update asap!

Reviewers: Thank you so much! I really appreciate all the reviews I'm getting!

MissB8604 – Aww! I'm sorry! But don't worry, I could never hurt Angel (Too badly) she'll be back to normal!

QuixoticLover -- cheers you on as you kill Jason Thank you so much! I'm so happy you liked the dream part!

Laurel Ducky – I'm so glad you love this story! That makes me excited! (And happy!)

POPpop – I'm glad you liked the chapter! I hope you like this one as well!

kawii-peach14 – Yeah! LMAO! I love how you kicked him in case he's not dead! Glad you like!

EloraCooper4 – Thanks so much! I'm so happy you understand why I wanted to explain how/why Angel fell in love with Jason (the ass as you put it, I do too). Thanks so much for the wonderful review!

emily fia – Thanks so much! I will update soon, get another long chapter in!

Believe the Lie – Yay! Another person who liked the dream sequence! That was the part I was so worried about! I'm glad you liked it!

A Handful of Rain – Don't worry, you reviewed now, and that makes me happy! And btw, Jason does suck!

five25600moments – Thank you so much! I love that you loved the dream sequence!

Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed. You guys make me blush and squeal from excitement! Keep on R&R!


	11. Chapter 11

Hello to everyone! I just want to say, to those of you keeping score, I forgot the day it's supposed to be today in the story, so I made it Saturday. That way it fits with my plot. I just didn't want someone who knew what day it was supposed to be read this and be like, wait it's supposed to be Monday, or whatever! Sorry if it confuses everyone!

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Angel awoke the next morning immediately sensing things weren't right. She rolled to her side, expecting to feel a warm body next to her, but there was none. Collins wasn't there. Angel opened her eyes and quickly sat up, looking around the room. There were plenty of clothes, make up, and accessories lying around, but no sign of Collins.

Angel took a deep breath and tried to calm herself. _He probably just went to the store. May be he woke up early…no, Collins never wakes up before I do. He went to work! Obviously…can't believe I got myself so worked up over this._ She chuckled to herself and settled back into her bed.

Angel shot right back up when she realized it was Saturday. Collins never went to work on Saturday. He always got his work done during the day on Friday. There were benefits to only teaching to class periods a day.

Angel's heart started racing as the many thoughts went through her head. Each one was worse than the last. As much as Angel wanted to think there was nothing to worry about, she knew better. She had woken up with a feeling inside her. She had a sixth sense. She could tell when things weren't right. She had intuition, which was never wrong.

She remembered all the times she's felt it. The morning of the day she got beat up for being gay. The day her parents kicked her out, although that was something she knew was going to happen. And the morning her grandmother had died. There were many other times, but those three incidents stuck out the most.

Angel brought herself back to reality, forgetting for a brief moment about her feeling. She slowly got out of bed, unsure of what to do. Angel looked around and decided to get dressed. Yeah, that would help keep her mind off of everything.

Angel decided on her favorite skirt, the white one with the pinkish-red, yellow and green flowers on it. She slid it on over her green tights. She put on a plain white long sleeve shirt. Angel quickly applied her make up, in the order she always did: foundation, blush, eyeliner, eye shadow, mascara, and lip gloss. She was never one for lipstick—it felt weird. So she always went with lip gloss. Angel smiled and put on a black headband, to keep her natural hair out of the way. Placing her black wig, the short one with the bob—her favorite, on her head; and putting on her black heels. She smiled at herself, feeling slightly better. The drag queen topped off the ensemble with a red, yellow, and green jacket.

Angel took a step back and looked herself over in the mirror. She smiled, realizing she picked out the same outfit she had worn the night of Maureen's protest. She laughed at the memories of it all.

The drag queen stopped and became deadly silent when she heard something outside her room. No…when she _thought_ she heard something. Angel knew that she was probably just freaking herself out, but that didn't push the fear away.

Angel approached the door, carefully and quietly. She stopped at the door, glancing back at the door, wondering if she should call Collins. If he wasn't at work, may be it was him who was making the noise. No, he always yelled something when he was home. Anything to let Angel know he was here.

Angel's shaking hand gripped the doorknob tightly, her knuckles turning white. Slowly turning the handle and peering out, she saw…nothing. She opened the door a little more and walked out. Nothing.

Just as Angel stepped out into the living room, she heard something behind her. She started to turn around, but was stopped by a sharp pain in the back of her head. She stood there with her now throbbing head for a few seconds before the darkness started to wash over her. One moment there was pain and then next…nothing.

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Collins was walking back to his and Angel's place. He was positively fuming. He couldn't believe he had left his Angel's side for nothing. Every step he took increased his anger and guilt.

_Collins had woken to the sound of his pager going off. It was quite early in the morning to need an AZT break, so it must be someone from work paging him. He quietly and carefully climbed out of bed. He grabbed his beeper and read the words: '911 at school.'_

_Collins eyes widened. There was trouble at NYU. Normally this wouldn't have affected him, but when a message like that is displayed for him, he knows it's a computer or technology problem._

_  
Collins glanced over at Angel's sleeping form. If he left now, may be he would be back before Angel even woke up. It was better than waiting to go until she woke up, and then explaining that he has to leave. Who knows when she was going to wake up anyways? _

_Collins quickly threw on some clothes and ran out the door, scribbling a quite note to Angel, should she wake up. He just put, 'Angel, there's a problem at work. I'll be back as soon as I can. Sorry baby. Love you, Collins.'_

_And with that note on the counter, he walked out the door. _

_  
Collins started to make his way to NYU. He didn't want to wait for the subway; it would be faster to walk. It wasn't that far. Besides, the subway wasn't due to come to this area for another 40 minutes—it had just left. Collins just wanted to get back to his Angel as soon as he could._

_Collins finally made it to NYU and rushed through the doors. He ran up to the front desk and said, "What's the problem here?"_

_The receptionist just stared at him. "Uh…there is no problem here Professor Collins," she stated, rather annoyed._

_Collins shook his head. "There has to be. I got a page and everything."_

_The receptionist went back to typing away on the computer. She shrugged. "May be it was just one of your students playing a joke on you, or something. Your pager number is listed here at this school." She said dryly. It was obvious that she was annoyed with the professor at the moment._

Now Collins was storming home. His anger about who would do something like this was getting the better of him. Why would someone want him out of his house? It didn't make sen—

His thoughts were interrupted by the realization. What if it was Angel's ex? He seemed to be the type to stoop to such lows. But how would he know who he was? Angel did know quite a few people on the streets, may be one of them let Collins' name slip. Then Angel's ex could have looked up his number—what did she saw his name was again? Oh yeah, _Jason._

He felt anger rise in him, just thinking about that man. How could he have ever done anything like that to Angel? _His_ Angel?

Collins was practically running now to get home. He was probably overreacting, but he didn't care. He just wanted to get home to Angel. That's all.

He rushed up the stairs and was horrified to open the unlocked door. He had forgotten to lock it. How could he have been so stupid!

He pushed the door open and called out, "Angel?" No answer. Collins immediate worries intensified.

Collins ran from room to room, searching for any signs that Angel may have gone out. But he noticed nothing. Everything was in the same way he left it—except there was no Angel here.

He walked into the kitchen and saw a note on the counter. He picked it up and his heart fell as he read the words, "Angel, there's a problem at work. I'll be back as soon as I can. Sorry baby. Love you, Collins."

That was the note he had written for Angel. She apparently hadn't gotten it. Angel threw it to the floor and paced the apartment.

Angel wouldn't leave without writing him a note or telling him. It just wasn't who she was. She hated to make people worry.

Collins grabbed his coat and walked out the door. He would go and look for Angel. May be she was just upset about being at home and went out and forgot to write a note. He was just worrying too much again. It's just what happens occasionally. But, none the less, he was going to look for Angel.

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Next Chapter: Collins continues the search. And we'll see what exactly has become of out poor Angel.

Please Read and Review!

To all my loyal reviews:

Thank you so much for continuing to review! It makes me all happy—so happy I squeal. It's what I do when I get excited over something. I don't scream, I squeal! Anyways, thank you so much! I'm really glad you all are enjoying this story!

Oh, and the title, it may seem random right now. But don't worry. It will come into play in the upcoming chapters!


	12. Chapter 12

I'm so sorry that I took so long to update! I got a little sidetracked by starting the other chapters! Sorry! Enjoy (hopefully)

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Collins slowly made his was to the couch after hours of searching for Angel. He fell onto it cursing loudly. He just sat there, staring at the wall opposite him. Collins had started his search at the loft. Only Mark was there. Apparently Joanne, Maureen, Mimi, and Roger all went out…somewhere. Collins wasn't really paying attention—Angel wasn't there. Collins left there and started looking everywhere. All the corners she usually played at, The Life Café, the community center where Life Support Meetings were held. No Angel.

He felt as though he had failed her. In Collins' frustration, he threw the pillow that was lying next to him at the wall. He couldn't believe he had let this happen to her. He had promised Angel that no one would get to her with him around. Collins had broken his promise.

Collins sunk further into the couch, shifting his gaze to the phone, willing it to ring. He was silently begging the phone to ring, to be her. Collins just stared at the phone, his mind spinning.

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_Uh..God, my head!_

Angel slowly opened her eyes, adjusting to the change of light. Her hand flew to her throbbing head. Where was she? What had happened? Where was Collins? A million and one questions flew through her head.

"You okay babe?" An all too familiar voice said. Jason.

Angel shot in her bed, staring at Jason. She realized that was a stupid thing to do, considering now her head was throbbing even more. "What am I doing here!" She demanded.

Jason laughed cruelly. He smirked and said. "Why, I just wanted to be with the love of my life."

Angel glared at him. "I'm not the love of your life, now I'm leaving." She said and got up out of the bed and started walking towards the door. Jason ran up and grabbed her arm. He twisted her around and forced her back towards the center of the room. "You're not going no where," he growled at her, that evil glint in his eye.

Angel froze, the fear already setting in. Angel normally could handle herself well. Not taking shit from anyone, speaking up to anyone who gave her grief. But things were different with Jason. They just…were. She was terrified of him because she knew what he was capable of. Jason pushed her away from him harshly. Angel cowered against the wall, trembling slightly. "Please…." She whispered. "Just let me go," she begged, tears forming in her eyes.

Jason laughed that laugh again, the one that made Angel's skin crawl. "No." he stated. "I love you Angel. You are not leaving me again," he said as he advanced on her.

Angel was shaking now, afraid about what was going to happen. _Run! Don't just stand here! Run! Scream! Do something…anything!_ She screamed inwardly. But she couldn't do anything, except watch him coming closer. He grabbed her arm and threw her onto the bed. "No…no…" she whispered, tears already flowing freely.

This can't be happening. Not again.

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Short, I know! I hope you guys like this. I have the other chapters at least partly written and I realized I needed a middle section. Something to show what happened before the next couple of chapters!

Please Read and Review!


	13. Chapter 13

I've been trying to update this story since my other update! I tried to double update that night, because I felt bad for making you all wait for so long! But it wouldn't let me!

I hope this makes sense to you, if not. Just think: Jason is evil and likes to be in control. That will help! Enjoy!

Oh, and btw…the chapter title comes into play in this chapter!

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Angel laid there trembling, hugging her knees to her chest. She stared out the window—the locked window. Jason had meant it when he said she wasn't leaving. The only window in the whole loft, that's what she decided this place was, had a lock on it. And the door was just ridiculous. Jason had put a lock on the _outside_ of the door.

Her eyes were red and swollen from the crying she had done. Jason had done it again. The twisted need for him to have Angel caused him to rape her. Again. Then, when she tried to fight back, let's just say…it didn't go over to well. And then, just like old times, he left Angel alone to go to the bar to drink away his "guilt". That is, if he had any. Angel groaned through her chattering teeth. How could she have let him? Angel's mind kept shifting back to when he said he loved her. It hurt. People always say that this, the physical pain and torment is what hurts the most. Well, they're wrong. It's what he says afterwards. How he loves her and cares for her, yet he continues to hurt her. No, _that's_ what hurts the most.

Angel continued to stare out the window. She had figured out that it was on the second story of a building. And it was near the community center where her and Collins went to Life Support meetings. It's a start anyways.

Her gaze shifted to the phone. May be…she could call for help? No, that wouldn't work. Who'd want to help her anyways? And besides, she didn't even know where she was. Angel sniffed; it was really cold in this loft.

She needed to hear someone or something…comforting. She reached out a shaking hand and picked up the phone receiver. She dialed and all too familiar phone number and listened to the rings. Finally, someone picked up. She sighed a sigh of relief and instantly felt more tears come to her eyes. "Collins…" she whispered.

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Collins hadn't really moved at all since he had gotten home a few hours earlier. He couldn't eat or sleep. What's the point anyways? His Angel is out there somewhere having…god only knows what happening to her! He was still staring at the phone, although his gaze did shift occasionally to the wall. His mind was a complete blank. The only thought running through his head was…Angel.

His heart leapt when the phone rang. He reached for it, bring it to his ear. "Hello?" He asked.

He heard something, sounding like quiet sobs and then a voice whisper. "Collins…" He almost fainted right there.

"Angel baby, are you okay? Where are you?" He asked her, trying not to sound too worried.

Angel sniffed again and said through her chattering teeth. "Yeah…I'm alright, I guess." She said quietly. She shivered again. Wow, it really was that cold in here. "As for where I am…I don't know! Collins, I don't know what to do, or anything. I'm stuck in this apartment….somewhere." She was sobbing now. "And Collins…I'm scared. I just want to come home," She said.

Collins heart literally broke as he listened to her. He would have given anything to be able to hold her in his arms and protect her, tell her everything will be okay. "Angel I'm coming to you," he told him, the certainty in his voice.

Angel sniffed, obviously trying to calm down, she had done enough crying. "Collins…I don't know where I am…or anything." She told him, getting slightly frustrated. She wanted to be with him right now more than anything. Hearing his voice, as much as it was calming her, wasn't enough.

Collins sensed her frustration. "Baby," he said gently. "Just tell me what you do know."

"All I know is that I'm sort of close to the community center." She said.

Collins nodded. "So it's near the community center. What else can you tell me baby?" He asked her, trying desperately to not show the fear in his voice. She was sounding so scared and fragile on the phone. It was killing him inside.

Angel shrugged. "It's facing so that the community center is to the right." She said.

Collins nodded. "Okay baby, hold on. I'll be there as soon as I can." He said softly, wanting her to know that he was going to help her.

Angel sighed. "Collins, you won't be able to get in. He's locked both the window and the door," she replied sadly.

Collins was silent for a moment, thinking. "I'll figure something out, okay."

Angel nodded to herself. "I better go now. I don't know what he'll do if he catches me on the phone."

Collins could only say, "Alright baby, I'll be there as soon as I can. I love you baby." He told her, sincerity in his voice laced with concern. As much hatred as he had for Jason at the moment, he was going to push it aside and focus on Angel. Not on what happened to her, but getting to her.

Angel smiled. "I love you too." She said quietly. And with that, they both hung up, wondering how this was going to work.

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Another shortie, but the next one will be longer, promise:D Please review!

EloraCooper4: takes muffin and eats it Aww thanks! And I loved your story so I was more than happy to review! It's sad it's over! Oh well, that's why there's a favorite list:D

To the rest of my loyal reviewers: I love you all! I would mention each and every one of you, but it's like 3 in the morning and I have to be up in a few hours. But I wanted to update! Hope you guys enjoyed!


	14. Chapter 14

Hey everybody! I'm trying to get these out, but I keep changing them! I know I'm coming close to the end of this story…unless I think of something else! (pm me with any ideas for this story or others! )

I wanted to give a heads up. School starts on Tuesday. Small private school! Anyways, so between school, dance team, show choir, musicals/plays, and work. I'm not sure how often I will be able to update! But I promise to update as much as I can! Cause I love you all so much!

Oh, and italics are thoughts, except for the one word in the third paragraph! Enjoy this chapter!

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Collins was out the door the second he hung up the phone. His worries for Angel were increasing with every step he took. Angel was normally able to handle herself. Able to stand up for herself; take no shit from anybody. Angel was one of the strongest people Collins had ever met. Angel went through more harassment in one week than most people do in months; she knew how to protect herself. That's why it frightened him to hear the weak, fragile, vulnerable sound in his love's voice. There was something about this man, Jason that changed Angel. And that in itself was frightening enough.

As his mind raced with thoughts, mostly of Angel, Collins' hadn't even noticed that he was now jogging down the street. Every time he turned a corner, he hoped to see Angel. Every time he got stopped at a stop light, he imagined what Angel could be going through right then. He knew this wasn't good for him to do, but he couldn't help it. He loved Angel so much and to know that he couldn't do anything to help her…killed him.

Thomas Collins was never the type to believe in love. Not necessarily that love didn't exist, just not for him. He believed that there were some people that were destined to be together, some people _meant_ for love. He knew he'd never be one of them. He thought he'd never care about someone this much. Not being able to do anything because he didn't know if she was alright. He'd never felt this overwhelming need to protect someone before now, before this…before Angel.

After what felt like hours, Collins finally made it to the community center. He couldn't help but breath a sigh of relief as he saw the familiar building come into view. He glanced around at the other buildings. There were two apartment complex looking buildings. The other ones were office types. One apartment was on the same side of the street as the community center and the center was to the left of the apartment. That one couldn't be it. Collins' remembered Angel saying that the building she was in was facing so that the community center was on the right. It must be the one on the other side of the street.

Collins walked quickly across the street and into the building. He got walked towards the mail box center. May be Jason's name would be on it—if this apartment was in his name. He searched the names. S. Chince; T. Opicola, and a few others names. So far he was having no luck. His eyes scanned across a few more names. R. Friedlen; K. Greatch; J. Lewis. _Wait, could that J stand for Jason? It's worth a shot. His number is 205. So that apartment is on the second floor. _

Collins left that area and ran up the stairs to the second floor. He passed the doors in a rush. 200…201….202…203…204…205! He walked up to the door and noticed a chain on it. Like the type that is normally on the inside of doors. Collins was certain that this was the right room. He walked towards the door, unlocking the chain. He eased open the door, almost afraid of what he was going to see. _Hold on Angel…I'm coming baby,_ he thought to himself as the door slowly crept open.

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Angel held the phone tightly in her hands, even though Collins was no longer on it. She hugged her knees tighter to her chest as she shivered again. She snuggled under the blankets more.

The drag queen couldn't help but smile at the thought of Collins. He was coming for her. He _was_. She knew he would do everything in his power to get to her. To save her. Protect her. Angel closed her eyes, needing to feel the comfort of his arms around her. She always felt safest, most comfortable in his arms. He was so sweet and gentle—she couldn't help but feel protected with him around.

She heard the lock on the side of the door jiggle slightly. She immediately placed the phone back in it's cradle, turned on her side so that her back was facing the door. She did not want to deal with Jason, not yet anyways. She curled into a ball more and snuggled under the blankets more. She was still trembling from the mixture of the cold and fear. She closed her eyes, hoping he would just leave her alone.

Collins walked through the door and felt like he's run right into a brick wall, seeing Angel in the position she was in. She was trembling and cowering under the covers. She looked so weak and frightened. Collins walked over to her and sat down on the bed. He noticed the fresh marks on her face and felt an enormous pang of guilt for letting this happen to her.

_Please, leave me alone. Just go away. I just want to go home. I want Collins…please have him leave me alone. Have him be so drunk that he passes out. That would be great._ Angel knew her luck wasn't that good. She had felt the figure sit next to her on the bed, but didn't move. She couldn't stop her shivering, but she did pretend not to notice the person.

Collins reached out his hand and touched her shoulder gently. "Angel?" He asked softly. He didn't expect her to answer. She had been through a lot right now, so she was probably exhausted.

Angel eyes shot open as she heard Collin's voice. She turned to him and smiled a weak smile. "Col-lins," she whispered through her chattering teeth. She sat up, wincing just a little. She had no reason to be afraid anymore. Collins was her. He was going to protect her. Get her out of here.

Collins smiled at Angel. He noticed her trembling again and reached out, pulling her into his arms. He held her close to him, wrapping both his arms around her. She was here. No, he was here with her. Collins was speechless. All he could do was hold Angel.

Angel clutched Collins' shirt tightly in her hands and buried her face into his chest. She let the tears flow freely. They were tears of fear, anger, frustration, and relief. She was feeling a million different things at once and they all happened at the same time.

Collins tightened his grip on Angel and began rubbing his hand across her back, trying to comfort her. "Shh…baby, it's going to be okay. Everything's going to be alright…" He whispered to her, continuing to whisper words of comfort into her ear. He gently kissed her forehead.

Angel nodded but continued to cry. She couldn't help the flow of tears. "I-I know," she chocked out. "I just…don't know." She whispered, looking up at him.

Collins nodded to her. He gently wiped the tears from her face. "I know baby. It's okay to feel…" He sighed. Feel what? He had no idea as to what she was feeling right now.

Angel looked down. "Afraid?" She asked him quietly. She hated that she was so afraid of this man, but she couldn't help it. Just the way he treated her, what he did to her.

Collins nodded, holding her closer to himself. "Of course baby. After everything you went through…" He sighed. "But I'm going to be here, so you don't have to worry, okay?" He told her. It was kind of a threat. Collins was in no way a violent person. He personally hated violence, but if Jason tried anything on Angel…Collins didn't think he'd be preaching about non-violence for too long.

Angel nodded. "Okay." She said quietly. "Collins…can we leave?" She asked him. She didn't want to stay here any longer than necessary.

Collins nodded. "Of course baby. Come on," he said. He got up and helped her up. She was obviously weak from everything. Collins wrapped both his arms around her waist, giving her a quick kiss. "It'll be okay."

Angel nodded, wrapping her own arms around Collins. "I know." She said softly. Collins held her tightly for a brief moment longer and then walked towards the door.

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I know, it's kind of short, but the next chapter is going to be long! Okay, so after I wrote this, I realized something. The next chapter will be the last (Unless I can make it into two chapters) I don't really have anything to say. May be I'll work on a sequal… not sure yet. Although if I do, I'm not really sure what I'd write it about!

Let me know what you think in your reviews! Thanks and love you all that read and review:D


	15. Chapter 15

Hello everyone! I'm so sorry for this delay! I've been so busy lately! I literally have three hours every night to do everything I need to get done, and if you knew me, three hours is not enough time! I've been working on this chapter for a while. I've written it out, but kept changing it. It's was a harder chapter for me to write! I hope you guys enjoy it! Oh, and there is some minor language down the page—just a heads up!

This is, sad to say, the last chapter! I've totally enjoyed writing this story. All the reviews made it so much better! I'll work on a sequel, probably. Not exactly sure yet. I have a few more ideas in my head (that sounds kind of crazy!). Just keep a lookout for me and the sequel!

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Collins had his arm around Angel, protectively. She had calmed down significantly. Angel was no longer trembling, but the fear was still there—in her eyes. In the way she had her arms wrapped around him so tightly, and how she was clutching his shirt. It hurt him to see Angel like this, seeing her fear and not being able to do anything about it. He gently ran his hand down her arm, trying to comfort her; let her know that he was there. Angel jumped slightly, startled by the feel of Collins' hand. Collins noticed the look of shock on Angel's face, quickly replaced with fear. His lips gently grazed Angel's cheek as he whispered, "It's alright baby…we're leaving."

Angel relaxed a little as she nodded to Collins. She wanted o get out of here as soon as possible. A noise at the door caused them both to stop in their tracks. Collins' head snapped towards the door, hoping it wasn't who he thought it was. Angel had let go of Collins and backed away, pressing herself into the wall. She was so close. So close to leaving this man behind her. In her head, everything she had ever gone through with Jason—everything he did to her, kept repeating over and over again.

Collins' eyes were still glued to the door. He couldn't bring himself to look away. He knew Angel wasn't in his arms anymore, but couldn't look away. He didn't know what to do. Should he just run with Angel, hide, or…what? This wasn't a predicament Collins wasn't normally in. All he knew was that Angel, his Angel, was terrified of this man, and what he had done to her. And to Collins, that was enough.

Angel heard the door opening and quickly ran back to Collins, snaking her way back into his arms. She immediately felt the safety in his arms as he tightened them around her. "Collins…" she whispered, her eyes glued to the door that was opening. She could hear Jason looking for something he had dropped.

Collins turned to face the, once again, shaking Angel. "Baby…I won't let him get to you. I won't leave you," he told her, promised her. She was clutching his shirt for dear life while her head was buried in his chest. Collins kept one hand on the middle of her back, keeping her close to himself. He brought his other hand to the side of her face, stoking her hair and face gently. He wanted to take this away from Angel—not let her deal with this. But that wasn't really an option anymore. Se had to face this, but he would be with her the whole time.

Angel felt Collins hand on her face and felt more relaxed. Collins always had a way with helping her calm down when she couldn't. "What the hell!" a slurred voice yelled. A drunken Jason had finally found what he had dropped and stumbled through the door. He was staring at Angel, his eyes piercing with anger. His glare shifted to Collins, who now had both arms around the visibly shaking Angel. "Who the fuck is he?" He spat out, walking towards them. "What the hell is going on here Angel?"

Angel was gripping Collins shirt so tightly now, her knuckles were white. She shook her head and choked out, "No…nothing…" Jason continued walking towards her, smirking. He knew he could have her under his thumb in a heartbeat. "Who's this then Angel?" He whispered smirking as he saw the chills he had caused Angel.

Angel shook her head, unable to find anything to say. She wanted Collins to leave so he wouldn't be hurt, but she wanted him, needed him here…with her. He eyes fell to the floor, unable to even look at Jason anymore.

Collins shifted his body slightly so he was almost in between Angel and Jason, shielding Angel with his body. He hated seeing that desperate look in her eyes. He looked up at Jason, meeting his eyes. "Who I am isn't important now," his voice low, threatening almost. He looked down at Angel. "We're leaving," his voice still quiet but much more gently now. Angel could only press her face deeper into Collins' chest and nodded—still unable to find her voice.

Collins had his eyes on Angel, unable to look away. "Oh no, you're not going anywhere," Jason muttered out. Collins looked up, trying to register what he had said. But was met with a fist to the jaw. He back away, letting go of Angel. That blow had caught him off guard. He knew it would leave a mark. Before he had time to fully recover another blow to the side of his head. He heard Angel screaming and crying. He wanted nothing more than to run to her and hold her, but knew that was not going to happen.

Collins had never been one to physically fight…with anyone. But he could handle himself in certain situations. He stood up and turned around to face Jason. Collins swung at Jason and hit him in the cheek, but it didn't faze Jason much. Collins figured he must have been in more than a few fights. Jason swung at Collins again, hitting him right in the cheekbone. Collins fell back slightly, feeling a warmish liquid slowly fall from the throbbing spot.

Jason laughed as he saw Collins backing away, even though he didn't know that Collins was trying to protect him. Collins, no matter who it was, didn't want to be the cause of giving anyone the virus that he had. Jason turned towards Angel was watching Collins, her feet cemented to the floor. He grabbed her arm, and turned to her to face him. "Angel!" Collins yelled as Jason tried to pull her out the door.

Angel turned to face Jason. She wasn't going to go through this…again. Enough was enough. She shook her arm from his grip. "Leave me alone," she said turning to walk back to Collins. She may have appeared to be strong, inside she was screaming with fear. He reached out to grab her arm again, but she pulled her foot back and kicked him in the stomach—6 inch pumps do come in handy for things other than just looking good. Jason was taking completely off guard by this and fell backwards, his head connecting with the floor with a sickening sound. He didn't move. Angel stared at the man now lying unconscious on the floor. She saw two dark, strong arms wrap around her from behind. Collins whispered in her ear, "Come on baby, let's go." Angel just nodded.

Collins wrapped an arm around Angel and they walked out of the apartment. Angel was clearly upset of what had happened. She looked up at Collins, noticed the marks on his face. "Are you okay honey?" She asked him.

Collins just smiled at her. How she could always put others before herself was beyond him. "I'm fine." He stated. "You?"

Angel smiled, a real smile for the first time in what felt like years. "I will be. Now that this is behind me."

Collins nodded and stopped at a phone booth. He stepped inside, dialing a number. Angel watched him closely. She couldn't help but wonder what that was about. He stepped out of the phone booth a minute or two later and put an arm around Angel. He began walking. "And what was that about?" Angel questioned.

Collins shook his head. "I just called to police to let them know that there were some disturbances in that building, and they might want to check it out." He told her. He knew she felt bad for just leaving someone there—no matter who it was.

Angel smiled at Collins and kissed him gently on the lips. "Thank you baby." She sighed, nuzzling her body closer to his. "Do you think I can finally leave this, him behind me?" She asked Collins softly.

Collins stopped walking and drew her into his arms. "I know you can." He stated simply. He pressed a quick kiss to her lips. He had no doubt in his mind that Angel could finally let go of this man.

Angel smiled and together they walked back to their apartment. Leaving everything that had happened at the old apartment building.

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There it is! The complete story! I couldn't help but use Angel's "catch-phrase" line!

What did you all think?

I really want to say thank you to all my loyal readers and reviewers! You guys made this story pretty much what it is, was!

Keep a lookout for the sequel. I'm also thinking of having an AU type of thing for Angel and Collins—they are my specialty! 

Thanks again you guys!

Sara


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